{"id":1445,"date":"2009-12-30T15:08:41","date_gmt":"2009-12-30T23:08:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lisabravermoss.wordpress.com\/?p=20"},"modified":"2022-06-10T17:21:36","modified_gmt":"2022-06-10T17:21:36","slug":"with-the-car-options","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lisabravermoss.com\/with-the-car-options\/","title":{"rendered":"A Rant About the Car Options"},"content":{"rendered":"

Somewhere in a parallel universe, economic, geopolitical and environmental factors have forced a civilization to rethink its automobile industry.\u00a0 In a Piedmont Post<\/em> exclusive, we are bringing you notes from this alien culture.<\/p>\n

Plan One: we\u2019re retrofitting our cars for energy efficiency.<\/em> New car manufacture has been the economic backbone of our city of Totride for decades.\u00a0 We looked into a comeback based on that premise, but had to consider the significant negative impact that automobile manufacturing, whether of Hummers or hybrids, has had on our planet.\u00a0 So we\u2019re putting people to work in a massive retrofitting industry whereby older, but perfectly good, auto bodies can get new, more eco-friendly insides.\u00a0 Solar, electric, algae-based biodiesel\u2014you name it, we\u2019re making it happen.\u00a0 We figure if we can send a man to the moon…<\/p>\n

We heard about \u201cCash for Clunkers,\u201d some kind of extra-terrestrial governmental rebate program that incentivizes people to trade in their gas guzzlers for new, higher-MPG models.\u00a0 It sounds so\u2026 well, foreign.\u00a0 We live by Reduce, Reuse and Recycle, so we don\u2019t throw out perfectly good stuff.\u00a0 We fix it.<\/p>\n

Plan Two: we\u2019re retrofitting our cars with rubber bumpers.<\/em> For awhile there, we made Styrofoam bumpers with the approximate life span of a coat of nail polish.\u00a0 We tried covering up this folly by installing high-tech cameras on our newer models so that drivers could engage in the ritual called parallel parking with less risk of a trip to the body shop afterward.\u00a0 We also claimed with a straight face that consumers preferred the painted bumpers aesthetically when it was the parts manufacturers, the body shops, and of course the auto industry\u2019s bottom line that preferred them.\u00a0 But then we realized we could make custom rubber bumpers out of old tires, employing thousands and solving the design flaw in one fell swoop.\u00a0 Who knows?\u00a0 Next we may tackle the wholly unintelligible dashboard\u2026<\/p>\n

Plan Three:\u00a0 we\u2019re actively promoting public transportation.<\/em><\/p>\n

Plan Four: we\u2019re\u00a0 retooling urban sprawl for mixed use.<\/em><\/p>\n

Published in the Piedmont Post<\/em>, July 8, 2009<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Somewhere in a parallel universe, economic, geopolitical and environmental factors have forced a civilization to rethink its automobile industry.\u00a0 In a Piedmont Post exclusive, we are bringing you notes from this alien culture. Plan One: we\u2019re retrofitting our cars for energy efficiency. New car manufacture has been the economic backbone of our city of Totride…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[35,36,37,38,39],"yoast_head":"\nA Rant About the Car Options - Lisa Braver Moss<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lisabravermoss.com\/with-the-car-options\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A Rant About the Car Options - Lisa Braver Moss\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Somewhere in a parallel universe, economic, geopolitical and environmental factors have forced a civilization to rethink its automobile industry.\u00a0 In a Piedmont Post exclusive, we are bringing you notes from this alien culture. 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