Mourning Twice

“Well then,” Rabbi Straus counseled, “you’ll need to give yourself permission to mourn twice.” The rabbi was new to our congregation, and I hadn’t met him yet; we were talking by phone.  “Mourn twice?” “Once for the mother you had, and once for the mother you didn’t have.” I’d just told Rabbi Straus that my…

How to Stay Trim

A recent article in the New York Times, “Fidgeting Your Way to Fitness” (May 11, 2011), suggests that “incidental” physical activity, such as drumming your fingers against your desk top in frustration, can burn calories and help maintain or augment your physical fitness. This is great news to those of us whose primary form of…

Vacation From Chaos

Late one recent afternoon, spinning my wheels on all kinds of tasks that needed my attention, I called my sister Erica.  “Hey Eri, wanna go get a drink, or a cup of coffee?” “Well—um, I’m kind of cleaning up my apartment, and—” her voice was tiny.  “I could use a hand.” She was asking?  Forget…

The Perils of Verbal Restraint

“Think before you speak”—could there be a clearer path to a wholesome life? But clinical tests now show that verbal restraint can lead to significant health problems.  Indeed, unspoken zingers and lost chances to tell someone where to go were recently identified as primary causes of word deposits in the body.  Researchers believe these fatty…

Sporty, or Impaired?

You know those fancy aluminum walking sticks that look like ski poles?  Okay, fine, like orthopedic canes?  Well, I went out and bought myself a pair. My artificial hip makes it difficult for me to get enough weight-bearing exercise, and when I saw a few people using sticks around town, I realized this could be…

The Right Way to Read

According to a recent S. F. Chronicle article by journalist Nicholas Carr (6/20/10), electronic media are eroding our ability to comprehend the written word.  Unlike printed material, text on a screen must compete with all the other visual stimuli that pop up on our computers.  Because of this, Carr argues, screen technologies are removing us…

How to Be Sorry

First: walk around with a sense of constitutional wrongness that makes you feel compelled to apologize all the time.  Be baffled that people tell you to quit saying you’re sorry.  Like prayer, like worry beads: what harm is it doing? When others talk about how difficult it is to admit to being wrong, think to…